As a minor key kind of gal, I often wonder:
Why does sad music make me feel so happy?
Why do I feel so thrilled when Jacques Brel sings of abandonment? Why do I prefer my Chopin in C sharp minor? Why do I love Leonard Cohen so much?
Aristotle thought that the answer to this phenomenon was catharsis — by immersing ourselves in sad feelings, we free ourselves from those same emotions in real life.
But psychologist Ai Kawakami has a more interesting explanation: that the sadness we feel “in the realm of artistic appreciation” is NOT THE SAME THING as the sadness we feel “in everyday life.” When we listen to tragic music, he says, we understand perfectly well that we’re listening to something “gloomy, meditative, and miserable.” But that’s not what we feel. Instead, this kind of music provokes romantic emotions — “fascinated, dear, and in love” — and even blithe ones, like feeling merry, animated, and “in the mood for dancing.”
Kawakami calls these “vicarious emotions” — we experience second-hand sadness, and somehow this transforms it into something lovely and positive.
But why are our emotional systems set up this way? Why is sadness beautiful when viewed from a distance? No one knows the answer yet.
But I have a guess. I think that love and loss go together, flip sides of the same coin – and when we hear music that makes us think of loss, it also makes us appreciate love – fragile, fleeting, evanescent, transcendent love.
In the meantime, here’s a more straightforward question:
What song brings a happy tear to your eye? #SadSongsSaySoMuch— Susan Cain (@susancain) October 11, 2013
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“Why We Like Sad Music”
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Your last paragraph made me immediately think of “Gone Away” by Offspring, a current favorite of mine. It’s a terribly sad song, heartbreaking, and yet, it is exactly that knowledge and acknowledgement of love that makes this song so beautiful.
Carolina in My Mind and Fire and Rain by James Taylor. The first about drug addiction, escape, and nostalgia, and the second about the suicide of a friend and fellow musician. I think part of it is that it is hard to feel better when happy, non suffering people try to cheer you up, but when someone speaks to you from their own pain you know you are not alone, and there is hope and beauty still. Knowing that makes me want to dance!
The first song that comes to my mind is “Hurt,” especially the Johnny Cash version. It’s incredibly sad and conjures all sorts of emotions, but it is also simplistically beautiful. Most songs by Morrisey or The Smiths are sad and depressing, but I just love listening to them and want to dance when I hear them!
I agree. When you are hurting, knowing someone else does to does make you feel less alone and hopeless, even when it is a different kind of hurt.
At the moment I would say it’s “Brave” by Sara Bareilles. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yNd_YXJXZOA. I cry every single time I hear it, but it also makes me think, laugh, dance.
Well, darn! My reply was meant for Holly. Sorry about that.